Chapter contents
The Birth Parents (and Others with Parental Responsibility)
The Role of Foster Parents in Contact
Restrictions on, or Termination of Contact
Principles of Contact
- A child’s parents are the most important people in their life. For this reason, as far as possible, children should be brought up in their families.
- Children’s Services will support families in order to prevent the need for children to be looked after by the local authority.
- Children’s Services will seek alternative family care when the child’s safety and welfare cannot be promoted or protected within the family.
- Fostering is a positive service to children and their families.
- When considering a fostering placement, the child’s wishes and feelings, and those of their parents and other significant family members will be sought and taken into consideration.
- Whether the child is living with their parents or not, the parents retain parental responsibility for the child. When married, both parents have parental responsibility. If the parents are not married, the mother has parental responsibility. Fathers can acquire parental responsibility if they are named on the birth certificate, or through a court order.
Parents are encouraged to be part of the planning process and to be actively involved in making decisions for their child. - Unless there are significant concerns, foster placements should be as near to the family as possible and siblings should be placed together.
- Whenever achievable, all work within the placement should be focused towards the child returning to the family as soon as possible.
- Positive contact reassures the child that they are loved and missed by their parents and still belong to them. They will know what has been going on in their family and the bonds will be kept alive.
For more information, read our Contact with Parents, Relatives and Friends Policy.
The Birth Parents (and Others with Parental Responsibility)
Every parent will respond differently to their child being in foster care. Many want to be involved in their child’s life while they are living with foster carers, but some do not. Social workers and foster parents should try to give them the opportunity to stay involved. This is because any separation will affect relationships, while positive contact can aid a speedy return of a child to their family.
Many parents experience feelings of shame or guilt if, for some reason, they are unable to look after their child. A parent’s inability to care for that child should not require them to forfeit respect as parents or people. Parents may feel shocked, angry, depressed, powerless or guilty, and social workers and foster parents can appear powerful and threatening to them. As a result, anger can be a common defence:
- Feeling angry with the local authority because they blame it for bringing the problem to light.
- Seeing the foster parent as an agent of the local authority – someone who condemns them for failing their children.
- Feeling angry with the child for not being ‘good’ and easy to look after.
- Being afraid of losing their child, and confused about the legal processes.
- Feeling bitter and uncomfortable if foster parents have a better standard of living and seem able to cope.
- Being afraid foster parents will replace them in their child’s affections.
As ISP foster parents, your reactions to birth parents are vital. Birth parents need you to accept them for who they are.
Things to remember:
- You are a responsible and professional adult in a very sensitive situation.
- The child in care is still the parents’ child.
- Be sensitive towards the parents’ and the child’s feelings.
- Be aware of your own feelings.
- Don’t contradict the parents in front of the child.
- Involve the parents as much as possible in their child’s life.
- The child needs them to accept their parents because they are part of them.
- Let your own negative feelings out safely and away from the child.
A child’s parents will always be important to them, and they will usually feel loyalty to them even if they are angry with them. A parent may want to talk to you about their child and how they are feeling. Be open, truthful and gentle with birth parents.
The Role of Foster Parents in Contact
Subject to the child’s care plan, we must promote, support and encourage children to maintain positive relationships with their parents and wider family, friends and others who are important to them.
The child’s placement plan will specify the arrangements made for contact with their parents and any other relatives. The arrangements will include the type of contact, frequency, timing, venue, transport and any need for supervision. You may have delegated authority to make some day to day decisions about contact arrangements.
Visits should be natural and active occasions and, as appropriate, involve going out, playing, etc. Contact might take place in a supervised contact centre, out in the community or at the birth family home. It will rarely take place in the foster home, although this sometimes happens with sibling contact where all siblings are in foster care and when the foster families make the arrangements.
Contact can be a very emotional time for children and their families. For this reason, the management of contact is one of the toughest aspects of fostering. However, we must work to maintain children’s links with their parents. For young children, where the plan is to return home, visits may be intensive and frequent e.g. several times a week. For older children, and where the plan is not rehabilitation, visits will be less frequent.
Contact can also mean letters or phone calls. Children should not be prevented from writing to, e-mailing or phoning family members, unless restrictions on this are part of the placement plan.
Supervised Contact
Sometimes the Care Order states that contact with particular birth family members must be supervised. When this is the case, ISP often facilitates the contact, at one of our regional centres. This ensures that contact can take place in a relaxed and comfortable setting, with facilities, games and activities on hand.
A contact supervisor will manage the contact, guided by a risk assessment provided by the local authority, and they will write a report of the occasion. You will be able to read a copy of the report on the child’s CHARMS record.
The supervisor’s job is to ensure that the child’s needs are met during contact. They will monitor conversation between the child and parent and observe their interactions. If the parent gives a gift to the child at contact, this will be noted. You and the child’s social worker will be informed to make sure that the gift is appropriate. This is particularly important if the gift is a mobile phone, or similar technology.
Support for Foster Parents
During the matching process, ISP will discuss with the placing authority how the child’s contact with family and significant others will be supported. This is an important issue, particularly when the child is placed a long way from home. Your role, and the local authority’s expectations, should be discussed with you at this stage.
ISP will give you practical help to set up appropriate contact arrangements. We will also support you to manage any difficult emotions that arise for you or the child as a result of contact. Discuss contact issues with your supervising social worker who will help you to resolve any problems.
Training opportunity: Promoting Contact
Recording Contact
ISP gives regular feedback to the child’s social worker about any significant reactions a child or young person has to contact arrangements or visits. In some circumstances, you and your supervising social worker might be called to give evidence in court about the nature and quality of contact.
You should record all contacts on the child’s CHARMS case record, using the progress action ‘Contact’. Record details of the contact, for example:
- Where it took place.
- Who was there.
- Your observations of the child’s emotions and behaviour before, during and after contact.
- Any comments made by the child (use their own words where possible).
You can enter this information in the ‘Notes’ box, or attach a separate document. Make these records as soon after the contact as possible. If for any reason you are unable to record the event on CHARMS, you should ensure a full record of the contact is made within your daily diary and details sent to your supervising social worker straight away.
All contact should be recorded, including face-to-face, telephone calls and letterbox contact. You should also note any failure to visit and the reason you have been given for this.
Restrictions on, or Termination of Contact
We will only place emergency restrictions on contact to protect the child from significant risk to their safety or welfare. In the event of such concerns your supervising social worker or registered manager will communicate these to the child’s Local Authority within 24 hours of being imposed. The Local Authority will make a decision on any ongoing restriction on contact, taking the child’s wishes and feelings into account. The restrictions will be regularly reviewed to see if contact can be reinstated.
Any termination of a parent’s contact with a child requires a decision of the court. When this occurs, the child still needs to know and be able to talk and ask questions about their parents. If you understand the parent’s situation, it is easier for you to explain kindly and truthfully to the child what is happening and why. In these circumstances, you should agree with the social workers what the children are told.
