Chapter Contents
Personal Space and Bedrooms
Each child over 3 will have their own bedroom., unless the placing authority has agreed that they will share a bedroom. In these circumstances, we will complete a Bedroom Sharing Risk Assessment. and include the arrangements in the child’s Placement Plan.
Encourage children and young people to personalise their bedrooms, with posters, pictures and personal items of their choice. If you are redecorating their room, allow them to help choose colours, any new furniture, bedding and decorations. This accords with a Secure Base model approach: the carer offering choice, negotiation within boundaries and promoting competence. The child benefits from the opportunity of choices, feeling effective and developing confidence and self-identity.
Children and young people should view their bedrooms as their personal space, where their privacy should be respected. Unless there are exceptional circumstances, or where it is age appropriate, foster parents and other household members (children and adults) should knock on the door before entering children’s bedrooms, and then only with their permission.
Situations where foster parents may have to enter a child’s bedroom include:
- When looking after babies and young children
- To wake a heavy sleeper, undertake cleaning, return clean or remove soiled clothing. In these circumstances you should let them know that this may be necessary
- To take necessary action (including forcing entry) to protect the child or others from injury or to prevent likely damage to property. The taking of such action is a form of physical intervention
Generally, you should discourage children from going into each other’s bedrooms, as they are private and unsupervised areas. If children are playing together in one of their bedrooms, make sure they keep the door open and that you supervise and check on them regularly. Encourage children to respect and look after each others’ possessions.
Do not allow children to spend time in your bedroom while you are in bed. The exception to this is where babies / toddlers up to the age of 2 sleep in the foster parent’s bedroom. Discuss sleeping arrangements with your Supervising Social Worker.
Foster parents should never share a bed with a foster child, even if the child is unwell.
When developing bedtime routines, be mindful of the risk of misunderstandings, or triggering experiences of possible abuse in the past.
Health and Safety
The Household Health & Safety Risk Assessment considers general bedroom safety. Keep children’s rooms in good structural repair, clean and tidy. If a child is at specific risk, e.g. that they may climb out of their bedroom window and go missing, we will agree strategies to minimise the risk and respond to any incidents.
Please refer to our Safer Sleeping Procedure for bedroom and sleeping arrangements for babies, including those in parent-and-child placements.
Clothing and Dress
You, and all members of the fostering household, should be mindful of being appropriately dressed and clothed around the home. Encourage children in your care to dress appropriately too. Provide dressing gowns and night clothes for children and adults within the home and use them as needed. This is particularly important after bathing or on night time trips to the bathroom.
It is also very important to respect the child’s culture and choices in style of dress. The children in your care may come from different cultural backgrounds and have different expectations around dress. Consider the child’s maturity and development, experiences, cultural norms, parental wishes and the child’s wishes, and seek guidance from the child and/or their social worker as to what is acceptable and appropriate.
Language
Be positive role models in your use of language. It is not acceptable to use swearing, defamatory or abusive remarks towards or in the presence of a child or young person placed in foster care. Children and young people may not have had the benefit of positive role models and may be accustomed to using inappropriate language or swearing. Think about how you will approach such language with sensitivity in order to help the child manage their feelings and behaviour more effectively.
Supervision and Play
Through play and with playfulness, foster parents can help children to develop meaningful attachments and build key skills such as communication and sharing. Play also promotes cognitive and social development and can support the child in feeling effective and part of the family.
Some children will wish to play with toys and enjoy activities which you may consider young for their chronological age. Allowing them to play with these toys can help them to enjoy developmental experiences that they may have missed as a younger child, and should not be discouraged.
Closely supervise young children, and those whose developmental delays make them similarly vulnerable to harm and accidents. Older children may ask to have more personal space and you should respect this wherever possible. However, you should make regular checks to ensure their well-being. Emotional availability of the foster parent is equally as important as physical proximity in supporting a child or young person to feel safe and cared for.
Reasons why children and young people may need support and supervision during play
- Feeling out of control or threatened in physical play activities;
- Lacking a sense of danger and be unable to protect themselves from risk;
- Becoming over-stimulated by boisterous play and ‘play fighting’. This can lead to play getting ‘out of hand’ and a child being hurt.;
- Having difficulty sharing and taking turns with other children.
- Needing guidance to respect other people’s toys
Be alert to disagreements between children and young people, and aware of the potential for bullying behaviour or peer abuse. This is most likely to happen with unsupervised activities. Behaviour will be of concern if it is compulsive, coercive, age-inappropriate or between children of significantly different ages, maturity or cognitive ability. Please report and discuss any concerns about bullying or other forms of abuse and mistreatment with your supervising social worker. If at any time you suspect that children are involved in abusive sexual relationships (as either perpetrators or victims) please inform us immediately. We will consult with the child’s social worker and initiate agency safeguarding procedures.
Technology
The internet and other digital technologies can bring many benefits to learning, and social networking can help to develop confidence and communication skills. However, there are risks to the safety of children and young people, both from their own behaviour and that of others. Discuss how you will manage these risks with your supervising social worker and the child’s social worker. This safety plan will be discussed, reviewed regularly and recorded in the young person’s risk assessment.
Issues to consider include:
- How will the young person use the internet?
- What internet-enabled devices do they own, or will you provide for them to use at home?
- What can they do online, e.g. school work, social networking, or gaming?
- Which apps and websites can they use, and which will you block with parental controls?
- To what extent does the carer need to monitor and supervise their internet activity? How will this be achieved?
Foster parents are responsible for helping children and young people develop their own understanding and awareness of risks associated with the internet. Children and young people are vulnerable to sexual exploitation or being bullied online. Have regular conversations with children and young people about their use of apps and websites. Support them to develop strategies to manage peer pressure online, and encourage them to let you know if anything is troubling them.
Be proactive in developing your own knowledge of the internet in order to safeguard children and young people in your care. Refer to our E-Safety Practice Guidance and attend our training courses. All agency social workers and fostering advisors receive training about online safety and can offer support and guidance to foster parents and young people as needed. Alternatively, they can signpost you to other sources of support.
You should also be mindful of your own use of social media and networking sites, ensuring appropriate content and privacy settings. During the assessment process, the assessing social worker conducts a social media check for all prospective foster parents. This is repeated at the annual fostering review.
Mobile Phones and other Mobile Devices
Mobile phones can be very helpful in maintaining contact with children when they are out and about. Discuss with the child’s social worker whether they should have access to a mobile phone, and if their use of it needs to be monitored or restricted. Consider how you will help young people to use their mobile phone safely, and ensure this is written into their risk assessment, and regularly reviewed.
Whilst mobile phones are important to most young people, please be aware of the risks of contact with people from whom they need to be protected, e.g. people who have abused them and human traffickers.
See our policies for more information:
