Sexuality and Sexual Health

Chapter Contents

Also see our safer care advice on this issue.

Talking About Sex and Relationships

Sex should be seen as a normal and healthy part of adult relationships.  It is important that children are able to learn and talk about healthy relationships, and their own sexual development, within the family home.  They need to be prepared for the changes that will take place in their bodies, and helped to understand their feelings and emotions during puberty.  Older young people will also need information about the law and consent – including an understanding of sexual assault and rape.

Age-appropriate conversations should take place at home, particularly if the child asks a question. Children will be receiving information from lots of places – not all of it true – and simple answers to their questions can help them to understand.  A child who understands is a confident child.

Sometimes conversations are difficult because different families, cultures and religions have their own sets of values about sex and relationships.  You might be caring for a child whose attitudes are different to yours, or you might be looking after a child who has experienced abuse and exploitation in the past.  An open and sensitive approach will help young people to learn that they can come to you with their questions and for help if they need it.

Training opportunity: Promoting Sexual Health

Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity

Happiness comes from being accepted for who we are – not living life according to the wishes of those who care about us. If a young person feels that they are lesbian or gay, transgender or non-binary (or they are unsure), then talking to somebody who understands will help. Ideally, that person will be you, but it could also be another family member, a friend, their social worker or perhaps a counsellor. 

Everyone needs the support, acceptance and understanding of those who are caring for them. Lots of people make different choices about their partners, often in the face of prejudice and hostility from those around them. Your supervising social worker and the child’s social worker will be able to advise and put you in contact with additional support services, groups or help lines that the young person can contact for advice.

If a young person is experiencing distress regarding their biological sex and gender identity (known clinically as gender dysphoria), you should consult with their GP about a referral to an appropriate gender dysphoria clinic. Services for children and young people are currently under review by the NHS and you can read more information about this here:

Cass Review

Sexual Health Services for Young People

Young people, including those under 16, need reliable information on sexual health and contraception.  They also need to know where they can get advice and treatment.  Let your young people know that they can receive a free and confidential service from:

  • Their own GP 
  • A local sexual health service (these often have young people’s clinics)  
  • Brook Advisory Centres (where available) 

Health professionals can give contraceptive advice and treatment to young people under 16 without their parents’ consent, if they consider the young person to be ‘Gillick competent’.   Young people under care orders have the same right to confidentiality and treatment from health professionals as other young people.

Foster parents cannot give consent for a young person to receive contraception and this should be referred to the child’s social worker if the young person has not been judged competent to make their own sexual health choices.

For more information, read our Sexual Health: Consent & Confidentiality policy:

Sexual Health – Consent & ConfidentialityDownload

Pregnancy

Some young people have a strong desire for a baby, particularly if their own childhood was unhappy. Research with teenagers who planned a pregnancy showed that they were often looking to create a family of their own, with love and stability that they may not have experienced in their own early years. Motherhood also offered an identity for some young girls who did not have a good self-esteem or clear career pathway.

Whether planned or unplanned, pregnancy needs to be dealt with sensitively. Together with the child’s social worker and your supervising social worker, you should help the young woman through her pregnancy and support whatever decision she makes about her baby. She may need help to decide whether to keep her baby, ask her family for support, or consider adoption, but it is her decision to make. If a young man is about to father a child, he will have feelings too. He must know that he can talk to you. He may also need professional advice on such matters as ‘parental responsibility’.

Sexually Transmitted Infections

Encourage and support your young people to learn about STIs and protect themselves if they are sexually active. Let them know where they can get factual information, and where they can go for advice and treatment.  Young people can get information and advice about STIs from:

  • Their own GP 
  • A local sexual health service (these often have young people’s clinics)  
  • Brook Advisory Centres (where available) 
  • The Sexwise website

If you know, or suspect that a young person has an STI (including HIV), please let your supervising social worker know.  They will contact the young person’s social worker and together you will help the young person get the treatment they need.